Friday, September 12, 2008

All Your LHC Are Belong To Us

Ladies and Gentleman,
The word is out.
Osama Bin Laden is no longer trying to obtain access to Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMD),
Such as nukes and warfare agents,
He is trying to access Weapons of Total Annihilation(WTA).
That's right,
Osama and his Henchmen are trying to take over the CERN Particle Accelerator.
Terrorists are trying to hack into the LHC and intentionally create a micro black hole that will send all of humanity to allah's doorstep wear the infidels will be judged accordingly.


That was only half true.
And the previous statement was also only half true.
Which makes the above story about %25 true.
And if you divide that by Pi squared,
That's about how much actually happened.

A group called "Greek Security Team" did it.
That's right, Greek.
Like Sparta.
CERN scientists suspect rival teams from other particle accelerators.
apparently, GST was only one level of networking away from the actually computer that controls the 17 mile proton smasher.
CERN says this whole thing is a "scary experience"
I tend to agree.
While I highly doubt that machine will create a black hole,
It will pump out substantial amounts off radiation.
And if not controlled properly,
The people that live above it could get cooked.
(Yes, there are residential areas above the LHC)

The GST timed their attack to go just as CERN powered up their 424.3 million Dollar behemoth.
They left several files on CERNs computers,
But only alter one original.
Damage appears to be minimal.
They also defaced CERN web page.
I would have put something a bit different.

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